Lost Without You
by Imperfect Being
Summary: Main character death.


**This is not one of my lovely dovey fics. Main character death.**

 **You've been warned. All mistakes are my own.**

All it takes is one devastating moment in your life that changes your world and everyone's around you completely. To lose the one person that means the world to you, to suddenly be taken from you with no warning or any signs of danger. To feel completely empty of emotions, to remember everything you've ever said to that person. To have regrets, like not answering your phone because you were at work, or you said something mean and hurt their feelings because they hurt yours. To go years without talking because you both are to stubborn to reach out. I saved your messages because that's the only way I can hear your voice, I looks at your pictures to remember the good times we've shared. I'm sorry that in high school I was a pain in the ass, but glad we reconnected years later. I'm sorry I didn't turn out the way you wanted me to. I'm sorry that I hurt you and that I didn't answer your call. Those who know me know that my mother died the beginning of this year. It's finally hitting me now that's she's not here anymore. I'm sorry if I'm boring you with personal information but I just needed to get this off my chest and sorry that I killed Sharon. But not all stories are filled with rainbows, unicorns, glitter, and love. If you still interested in reading this story thank you.

As the sun was setting on the first day of fall, the smell and taste of the ocean engulfed him as he walked straight into the ocean in his black suit with a dark purple dress shirt, with black suspenders and a black tie. The strong waves pushing him back from certain doom that he wished to face. To feel something besides heartbreak and loneliness from the pain of losing the one he loved so dear in this world. He knelt down as his knees sinking into the ocean floor, bowing his head down as warm tears fell along his cheeks. Gasping for air as he cried for her and for her children. He watched the sunset with it all it's beauty like a mirror it glowed in the ocean waves.

-/-3 Hours Before-\\\\\\\\-

They said their final goodbyes tears running down everyone's cheeks, family and close friends even Louie cried for her as they closed her casket. She wore a dark purple dress with her favorite black cardigan and her black jimmy cho shoes, her hair in natural curls with light make up and mauve color lipstick. They all watched her casket slowly being l drop in the rectangular hole in the ground. Her whole team placed a single red rose over her casket. Emily hugged tightly to Andy as they both cried as her mother and his wife were no longer visible. Ricky looked over at his little brother crying and pulled him into his arms as they both cried together mourning the loss of their mother.

Nicole crying into her husbands arms as she watched her father loss the women he loved as he cried in the arms of his step daughter Emily. Amy was in Chucks arms both sad to see their friend and comrade gone, but at peace. Tao was with his wife Nancy, Julio was with his mother both silently praying in spanish for Sharon as well as Flynn and theirs kids, Buzz was with his girlfriend a good friend of Sharon's Kathryn. Finally Taylor was with his wife Kandice. On the other side the LAPD Officers fired 15 rounds in the air as a contribute to Sharon Raydor's services then saluted her family, friends, and fellow police officers.

As he entered the empty house, it wasn't the same with her not here. He could still smell her as he traveled throughout their house with wet clothes and soaked shoes going into their bedroom laying down on her side of the bed hugging and covering his face in her pillow and sheets, enjoying the scent of vanilla and jasmine she left behind. Remembering the times they would lay in bed reading books and making love.

He woke up hours later his clothes still damp, he stood up taking his clothes off and took a shower. Everywhere he went in the house smelled and reminded him of her. He cried more in the shower, stepping out he heard his phone ringing but refused to answer it, he wasn't in the mood to talk to anyone. He just wanted to be alone, and that's what he was now, he was alone.

He took out his glock and placed the barrel in his mouth. He couldn't live in this world specially not without her in it. She was his world, his reason to live, he wife, his lover, his best friend, his companion, and his other half. Now she was gone, taken from him, they were laughing and talking about a case they were working on while making dinner when she just fell into his arms. The taste of metal and lead was strong in his mouth as memories of that night flashed in him head.

Andy was preparing the salad as Sharon was cooking the Thai stir fry with tofu. Once he was done with the salad he placed it on the dinner table then headed into the kitchen to grab their drinks kissing her cheek and whispering he loved her.

Sharon smiled and kissed his lips saying she loved him too. Sharon turned off the burner then placed the stir fry on their plates. Andy was next to her when he watched he place the frying pan down then started falling backwards. Andy moved quickly catching her before she smacked her head on the floor.

Shouting her name and looking down at her. Her eyes were open but no light was in her eyes. She just stared at the ceiling. Andy placed his two fingers on her neck and felt no pulse. He laid her body straight and tilted her head up and breathed through her mouth then did chest compressions.

"Come on Sharon, come back to me Sweetheart" as tears ran down his cheeks.

He ran to their bedroom, looking for his cell and dialed 911. He stayed on the line still doing CPR till the paramedics came. They hooked her up to an oxygen mask as Andy held her lifeless hand in his. Running his hand through his hair.

At the hospital he called their kids and told them what had happened. Rusty was the first to arrive, Emily and Ricky would arrive hours later since they had to get on a plane. Rusty held Andy's hand as they waited to hear the news from Dr. Reed.

The doctor came out and asked them to follow him into his office. As he shut the door he looked at them both with a gloomy expression.

"The good news is we stopped the bleeding in her brain."

"How did that happen?" Asked Rusty.

"Sharon had two brain aneurism in her brain that caused two blood vessels in her brain to explode."

"But she was healthy how could this have happened to her?" Rusty voice was starting to raise.

"Brain aneurism can happen to anyone Rusty even the healthiest of people."

"So what's the bad news doctor?" Asked Andy.

Dr. Reed exhaled loudly looking Rusty then Andy in the eyes.

"She had a lot of blood in her brain and the fact she is not breathing on her own that she won't be the same Sharon she use to or ever well be. Their is a 99% chance she will be stuck on that bed and on life support forever"

"So doc what you are saying is Sharon is dead?"

"It's a possibility, but my honest opinion yes Sharon Flynn is dead, I'm sorry for you loss."

"NOOOOOOO, SHE CAN'T BE DEAD!" Yelled Rusty as he storms out of the Dr. Reed's office.

"Listen Andy, I know you have a hard choice to make but the decision is up to you. To keep her in the state she's in and hope one day she wakes up or pull the plug and she if she ready to move on. Yet again I'm sorry I don't have much good news to tell you."

Andy's eyes mist over, gasping for air and hearing his heart beating rapidly in his chest. The doctor bent Andy over telling him to breath and relax knowing it was hard right now finding out the women you love is in fact dead and is waiting on to end her life.

After a few minutes his breathing was under control. "I have to talk to her other children first before I decide anything."

"I understand completely, take your time and get back to me."

Andy left his office and ground Rusty in the bathroom crying.

"I can't loss her Andy, I just can't!" He sobbed into Andy's arms.

Andy ran his hand along Rusty's back. "I know kid, I don't wait to loss her too, but something's in life happen and it's hard to understand why and let them go."

"I'm sorry for my outburst early Andy."

"Shhh it's okay Kid, we understand. I'm going to miss her too." Kissing the too of Rusty's head.

They walked into her room as they both took turns talking to her and brushing her hair. She looked terrible with the tubes in her throat and nose, her face pale and turning a little yellow, the left side if her face more swollen from the swelling from her brain bleeding.

Eight hours later Emily and Ricky showed up both of their eyes blood shot from crying. They gasped as they saw their mom laying on the hospital bed.

"She looks like she's sleeping." Says Ricky as he moved some on her hair away from her clammy face.

"If only she was Ricky." Cried Emily, and came behind her and hugged her. She turned into his arms breathing into his chest. "I'm so sorry Andy." She sobbed.

He held onto her tightly. "I'm sorry too Sweetheart."

Visiting hours are over and they all left to go to Andy's place to discuss what they would like to do. After discussing all night they all decided to pull the plug and see if she was in fact really dead.

As they came into her room the next morning saying their goodbyes and kissed her cheek, Dr. Reed pulled the plug. They waited and five hours later she passed away. Andy took the kids back to his place as they sat at the dinner table reminisce about Sharon.

As Andy was about to pull the trigger when he heard her voice.

"Andy." She whispered. "Please not like this, you are better than this."

He slowly pulled his gun away from him mouth, putting the safety on and placed it next to him crying.

"I can't love without you Sharon, I don't know how." He cried to himself.

"Yes, you can Andy, do it for Rusty, he's going to need you more than ever. And do it for out children. I love Andy don't ever forget that." As he felt a light touch on his cheek.

He exhaled loudly and placed his hand in his cheek. "I promise Sharon, I'm sorry. I love you too and miss you so much. This house isn't the same with you not here."

"I know Honey, I'll be waiting for you on the other side, take care if my babies and please take care of yourself too."

"I can't wait to see you again Beautiful and I will."

Andy woke up to a grumpy Louie slapping his face.

"Wake up you idiot!"

"Okay okay I'm awake, what are you doing here?" Rubbing his eyes.

"The kids were worried about you and they have every right to be." Pointing towards his gun on the floor. "Pull yourself together Andy and get your shit straight, they need you more than ever."

"Yes, I know. I'm sorry I just miss her is much Louie." Tears falling from his eyes.

Louie wrapped his arms around him. "I know Andy, I know. It will get better from here, yes it will take some time but it will get better." Hugging his best friend.

The End


End file.
